All right boys, this one is for you.

While I was making the recipe for this month, I was thinking, “Some guy could totally make this for his girlfriend and earn unlimited back rubs or something.”

Guys, do you want unlimited back rubs!? I would suggest making your girl some fine food.

But okay, before I even start, I know. This dish sounds too fancy to be true. It sounds like something that a woman with a 10k rock on her finger would order at a restaurant in New York while sipping Pellegrino water. But it’s actually really simple, and tastes amazing. Granted, I was really hungry when I first ate it, but even three hours later out of a Tupperware container it was great.

Can you use a hammer? Can you dip chips into dipping sauce? Can you flip pancakes? Can you count? If yes, then you are capable of making this meal my friend. I believe in you.

The ingredients to this elegant dish are:

  • 4 bone-in pork chops
  • 2 cups of all-purpose flour
  • 4 large eggs
  • 2 cups panko breadcrumbs
  • ½ cup grated Parmesan cheese
  • Salt and pepper
  • ¼ cup olive oil
  • 2 tablespoons butter
  • 1 garlic clove, minced
  • Juice of 1 lemon
  • ¼ cup extra virgin olive oil
  • 1 red onion, thinly sliced
  • 3 cups arugula
  • 1 cup grape tomatoes, halved
  • 12 fresh basil leaves

That seems like a lot, but remember your skills. You can do this.

First comes the hammer expertise. Place your pork chops on a cutting board and cover them with a piece of plastic wrap. With a rolling pin, a meat mallet, or if all else fails, a hammer, pound the meat until it is ¼ inch thick. Then season the meat with salt and pepper.

Then you are going to set up a breading station. If you’ve never done this before, you have three bowls, one with flour, one with egg, and the third with breadcrumbs. Make sure you whisk the eggs together. Next, stir in the Parmesan with the breadcrumbs.

This is where you need to know how to dip. One chop at a time, plop it into the flour and coat both sides. Take it out of the flour, and plop it in the egg. Take it out of the egg, and coat it in the breadcrumbs. It’s that simple.

Breading Station. Photo credit: Andrea Raby

When those are all coated, heat up a large sauté pan (a pan you would make pancakes in) and add the olive oil and butter. Let that heat up for a bit and then add the pork chops. Cook those babies until they’re golden brown, usually about 4 to 6 minutes per side.

Now it’s time to make that fancy arugula salad. In a large mixing bowl, combine the garlic (remember, mincing means really tiny pieces), lemon juice, extra virgin olive oil and 1 teaspoon of salt. Then add the onion, toss it around in the liquid, and let it marinate for ten minutes while you go feed your cat.

Photo credit: Andrea Raby

Oh did Mr. Whiskers scratch you while you were feeding him? I don’t care, your ten minutes are up and you have a dinner to finish.

Add the arugula, tomatoes and basil to the dressing and mix it all together. To serve it, put the pork chop on a plate and the salad on top. It looks sophisticated but all you did was drop it on a plate.

Men, your ladies are ready to be wooed through the sweet taste of pork chops. Go get yourself some unlimited back rubs.

Photo credit: Andrea Raby

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